Happy New Year from us all at Len’s Self Storage.
The bells have rung in 2019, meaning it’s time to store away those Christmas knickknacks for another year. But just as you’re trying to cram your tree back to its usual spot back up in the cluttered loft, you realise you need to clear away much more than tinsel, baubles and fairy lights. We’re talking about those well-intentioned but unloved Christmas gifts taking up space around your house.We’ve all been there. Sure, they say it’s the thought that counts. But try telling your face that on Christmas morning when you unwrap a questionable gift choice. With some of the iffy presents out there, you’ve really got to wonder if some friends and family actually know us at all.
To help offer self-storage support, we’ve put together our top 10 Christmas gift fails that you might just want to put into storage (for good) in 2019. After all, you’d feel bad throwing them away. And you never know when the gift giver in question might pop round expecting to see their thoughtful present being enjoyed.
We’re talking about gift fails in this blog which, despite being very questionable choices, are worth hanging on to in some way. But if you received a particularly terrible present, we’ll be honest – rather than place it in a storage unit, it’s probably better to re-gift it to someone you don’t like.
1. Christmas jumpers
Don’t get us wrong – a light-up Rudolph knit really looks the part on Christmas morning, bringing some festive cheer to the occasion. But then what? Beyond Boxing Day, it’s well and truly served its purpose and just takes up space in your wardrobe until next year. Thanks, but no thanks. Into storage it goes.
2. Naff ornaments
Okay, style is a matter of personal taste. But there’s no denying that when someone buys you an ornament, lamp or some other trinket you can’t stand to look at, you’re left with a dilemma: What to do with the ugly vase your mother-in-law got you? You can’t give it away. Because she’ll want to see it in pride of place on your mantelpiece next time she’s round. Keep it in the house, and you might just be tempted to accidentally knock the thing over. You’re probably better off letting Len look after it.
3. Passive aggressive gifts
Some family members truly take pleasure in giving you the gift of judgement each year – in the form of a present that says something about an aspect of your life they think you need to work on. If you unwrap a toilet brush, feather duster and new vacuum bags on Christmas morning, it’s probably not because they thought you’d prefer chores to chocolates. This practical, but personally-insulting type of gift choice belongs in room 101, never mind a storage unit.
4. Deodorant gift sets
For some reason, antiperspirant-gifting aunties have become as much a part of Christmas as heart burn, nap and family arguments. It’s lovely that they don’t want you to smell. Very thoughtful. However, there’s only so much deodorant and shower gel one bathroom can take. Particularly when it leaves you smelling like you’re back in high school. Still, it’s handy to hold onto to re-gift to a younger nephew or niece ne xt year. And so it continues.
5. Singing fish
Picture the scene. Your father-in-law looks on with excited optimism as you pick up his gift. He’s got a look that says ‘You’re gonna love this.’ That’s when you unwrap a ‘Billy Big Mouth Bass’. Yes, you read correctly. It’s an animatronic singing fish. But why? Are these still a thing? Is it because you mentioned you liked The Sopranos? No one knows and there’s no point trying to figure out why he thought you wanted this triple-threat of a fish. But one thing you can be sure of – there’s a storage unit with Billy Big Mouth Bass’ name on it.
6. A boxset you’ll never watch
Imagine opening a ten-part series about the canals of the Midlands, despite never once mentioning any interest in the canals of the Midlands. You’re not alone. The problem is, the whole thrilling experience has now barged into your living room and is taking up loads of space on your shelf. You’ve only just cleared out DVDs. And it has a companion book. It’s tempting to get rid, but what if they ask to borrow it in a f ew months’ time? Don’t risk having to have an awkward conversation. Keep it stored for the future. And remember, you love Britain’s waterways.
7. Noisy stuff
Grandparents have that lovely habit of buying gifts that seem a joy on the day, but soon place a burden on your sanity. Drum sets. Recorders. Cat keyboards. The noise is horrendous. It’s a piano that meows. Seriously. You could be forgiven for thinking it’s quite cute on Christmas morning. But by Boxing Day, you’re really struggling to go on. Did they buy the thing to torture you? Well, don’t despair. We have somewhere you can lock it away. It’s up to you if you throw away the key.
8. Inappropriate novelty jokes
Nothing shows a friend’s support like the well-thought gift of a novelty piece of tat called ‘grow your own boyfriend’. Said no one ever. What a hilarious gift to help you get over that recent breakup. Here’s our advice – hang onto it. Store it away for that day when, maybe, just maybe, you can smugly re-gift it back to them.
9. Questionable art
Now, a beautiful hand drawn portrait from an artsy cousin is lovely. It truly is. But here’s the thing – this year, they’ve made you look like a cross between Mick Hucknall and the Babadook. You try to keep a straight face as, mortified, you unwrap it. “Wow” you exclaim. “Really, wow. That’s so… me. What a talent.” Don’t worry, we’ll keep it safe. Locked in a dark room where no when can see it. You only have to it put up on the wall when they’re visiting next Christmas. Cringe.
10. Inspirational life quotes
A three-foot sign etched with the words ‘dogs have owners, cats have servants’ must be hilarious for some people. But here’s the thing – you don’t have a cat. You try your best to sound sincerely thankful as you unwrap it. You do a fake laugh that sounds way too hysterical. And for a moment actually think – ‘would it be less awkward if I just bought a cat to go with this sign?’ Don’t do that. Just place this inspirational quote in storage. You can plonk it back in the garden when your relative’s next in town.
Whatever Christmas clutter you’ve collected, Len’s Self Storage have a whole range of self-storage solutions to suit you, with sites in both Edinburgh and Glasgow.
Why not check out our New Year deals here.